I love giveaways and the more places to link up your giveaways the better! Last Sunday I posted an inlinkz where you upload a thumbnail image of the giveaway. This week I will try the Linky Tools. I am curious to see which one people like better.
Please post in this manner: Blog name, giveaway item, date ending. Please link directly to the giveaway and not your blog name.
31 entries so far… you’re next!
Love & War, Part III
This week in our small group study of the book Love & War, we learned that spouses tend to bring a lot of pressure to their marriage. Most of us are unaware of the amount of pressure we bring . The biggest pressure we feel is to make each other happy. Well, guess what? That can’t be done. It’s not your job.
Don’t get me wrong, you can be happy with your spouse, but if your spouse is not happy, it has nothing to do with you. If your spouse is in a bad mood, it has nothing to do with you. Knowing this simple message means you can take the report card away from your spouse. How they are doing is not a verdict on you.
I know that once I let that thought sink in, it really took the pressure off me. I used to let my husband’s moods and actions be a barometer of my day or my mood. If he seemed grumpy or upset, I would always ask if he was mad at me. He wasn’t, and he didn’t like me asking that. Now I understand that it is not a verdict on me. Just as if I’m not in a good mood, it is not a verdict on him.
As I am studying this book, I am also trying to build my relationship with God. He is who I can turn to for understanding and comfort. I have been looking to my spouse to provide things that only God can provide. I have a long way to go in building my relationship with God. It is definitely a work in progress.
Love & War, Part II
If you follow my blog, then you know that my husband and I are doing a study on the book Love & Warin our small group as I talked about.
The first week we talked about the first shock of marriage: marriage is hard. This week we talked about the second shock of marriage: that both of us are a royal mess. Take one mess and put it together with another mess and you get a ROYAL mess. We talked about how our messes and ways of brokenness collide with the other’s. How we relate to our brokenness is what gets in our way of a truly great marriage.
But wait– that is what God wants. Marriage is a divine conspiracy arranged for our transformation. We can use our brokenness to play off each other and grow. If we continue to brood about our spouse’s brokenness, it WILL damage the marriage. We need to shift our way of thinking from “how can I change you” to “how can I change me”.
Our homework is to tell each other the story of our lives. To actually take a few hours each, really sit down and focus, and tell the story of our life. Once we understand where their brokenness comes from, we can find more compassion to what before drove us nuts. Hubby and I have been married for almost 20 years, but I am sure that we will each still learn something about each other. I encourage everyone to to sit down and learn your spouse’s story as well.